The Legend of Bart
by BartHumphries
Summary: What if "Link" (Bart) were an ordinary guy from our world who found himself in the original Legend of Zelda game and went through what something akin to Bill Murray's character in the movie Groundhog Day? Bart would have to learn all about the new world that he found himself in, while seeing if there was anything he could do to escape. First, though, he has to play along.
1. The Game begins -- LoB 01

The Legend of Bart, Chapter 1

Bart blinked his eyes, his vision filled with a vast sheet of empty blue, then rolled up off the dirt onto his feet. "What a night," he murmured to himself. These LARP events were always a blast – his personal mantra was that if you didn't come home dead tired after a multi-day event, you weren't doing it right. He was standing with his kite shield in a large dirt clearing with masses of trees around him. These trees didn't look quite like the pine trees that he was used to, though, they were far too close. It was like one of those English hedge mazes, but with the mouth of a cave on the corner.

"Hey, guys!" He looked all around him, but no answer was forthcoming.

"Helloooo! Heeello!" He could see some trees that blocked his vision to both sides and in front of him, off in the distance there were some sort of large red things wandering about. The cave seemed like an obvious place to start – caves made great headquarters and you could usually find an NPC in one.

An old man stood in the cave, fires burning on either side of him. "It's dangerous to go alone! Take this," he said. A sword lay on the ground in front of him.

"Cool," Bart said. He picked up the sword and his eyes widened. This one had some actual real heft to it, this was no boffer weapon! He held it in both hands and swung it around in front of him, marveling at how it felt. It was a great sword, but highly impractical. He could see that the edge was bright and shiny, obviously sharp and likely to chip as soon as he hit anything, and of course he couldn't use it in the boffer fights. "Uhm, thanks, but am I really supposed to take this?"

The old man stood there, regarding him impassively. "You want me to take this?" He looked at the old man and waved his hand. Bart held up his left hand, fingers crossed, in the "I'm out of character" signal for the LARP. "Look, this is obviously expensive and someone is going to be missing it. Are you certain that you wanted me to take this?" The old man continued to regard him impassively, not saying anything.

"Ok, then I guess this was really what you meant when you said that it was dangerous to go alone and that I should take this." He backed slowly out of the cave, giving the old man plenty of time to say something else, expecting a further challenge to be issued any moment. He bBarted in the sunlight as he exited the cave, feeling as though he'd missed something. Well, if he had to pick a direction, it would be to go see what those red things were in the distance.

They were amazing animatronic works, trundling along, shooting some sort of brown balloon, filled with talcum powder that burst on impact, although they must be assembling the balloons inside, surely they were too small to hold much in them. He ambled forward for a closer look and one of the brown balls bounced off his shield, knocking him slightly off balance for a moment. Those weren't balloons, they were much harder. Perhaps this was what the sword was for. He held it out in front of him, swinging it around like a baseball bat and suddenly a phantom image of his sword projected out in front of him and impacted a creature! With a flash of light, the creature vaporized, leaving not a trace behind it other than its footprints in the dirt.

He stood there in shock. "What the," he started to say, when another ball hit him in the stomach, knocking him off his feet. A wave of nausea swept over him and he had the distinct sense that he was weaker now. He swung his sword around again and nothing happened. "I must have, I." As he stood there, another ball slammed into his unprotected right side and another hit him from behind. He coughed and was surprised to see some red drops fly from his mouth into the dirt in front of him. He turned his aching body and furiously brought the sword down onto a creature. It also vaporized and disappeared. A brusque treatment of the third creature left him alone in the clearing until a fourth creature that he hadn't noticed among the bushes walked into him. It touch burned like fire and, as he closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, he felt himself falling backward.

Bart blinked his eyes, his vision filled with a vast sheet of empty blue, then rolled up off the dirt onto his feet. He was back where he'd started, but with this difference, he held his new sword in one hand and the shield in the other hand. He stormed into the cave to confront the NPC. "What happened out there, what are those?!" The NPC stood there as impassively as before, seeming to look off into the distance, not at Bart at all. "No, seriously, out of character, what's going on here?" Bart waved his sword in front of the NPC's face. "Come on, out of character, snap out of it." He put his sword into his left hand, awkwardly holding both the sword and shield and clapped the NPC on the shoulder. "This is just getting crazy," he started to say, but the NPC suddenly blinked out of existence, and a moment later a fireball shot out of one of the fires and slammed into him.

His mind filled with a sense of pain and as he screamed the stench of burning flesh assaulted his nostrils. "Medic!" He tripped over his feet as he started to back away and a fireball from the other fire hit him in the other side. He rolled over on the ground, onto the sword. His eyes closed as he could feel his bowels emptying and another fireball slammed into his hair.

Bart blinked his eyes, his vision filled with a vast sheet of empty blue, then rolled up off the dirt onto his feet. He was back where he'd started, but with this difference, there weren't any wounds, only the memory of them remained. This must be Hell. Either that or someone had kidnapped him. He looked at the row of trees ahead of him and decided that if they wanted him to follow the path, he was done with that. He started hacking at the trees in front of him but his sword passed uselessly right through them as though they weren't real. He threw his sword and shield to the ground and thrust himself into the trees, grabbing as high as he could and lifting, scrabbling for a higher branch to step on, and his vision blacked out.

Bart blinked his eyes, his vision filled with a vast sheet of empty blue, then rolled up off the dirt onto his feet. He was back where he'd started, but with this difference, his sword and shield were back in his hands. Maybe that webcomic had been right, maybe people really did want to experiment on geeks. Maybe he was in some sort of virtual reality world. He cursed and glared around angrily, looking for someone to take his anger out on. He must have been kidnapped, that was the only explanation. Well, if they wanted him to go explore, then that must be what he'd have to do. He'd play their game, for now, but only until he figured out how to break out.


	2. What are the rules -- LoB 02

The Legend of Bart – Chapter 2

Bart cautiously crept the ground until he got closer to the four little red monsters, trundling back and forth in an apparently random pattern, pausing only to shoot their little brown balls from their oversized mouths. Somehow, he'd have to take them out, since he didn't want to risk missing one in a bush again and getting burned by its touch. He waved his sword experimentally and a phantom image of his sword projected out in front of him, flying through the trees right into one of the little monsters, vaporizing it. He swung the sword a second time and nothing happened.

"Come on," he screamed up at the sky, "That's just ridiculous, you're only going to give me one long attack each time I walk out here and that's it?" He swung the sword again and this time a phantom image projected out in front of him, flying through the trees, finally choosing a tree to impact on, but not leaving any mark on the tree. "Ok," he yelled at the sky, slightly mollified, "Ok, that's more like it."

He cautiously advanced on a red ball monster, his shield in front of him, braced for impact. Two balls harmlessly bounced off his shield and then, when the monster had walked forward between two bushes and wouldn't be able to move to the side, he swung his sword past the shield, intending to project a phantom sword at the monster, which he did, vaporizing it, but his metal kite shield was repulsed away from the sword at the same time, allowing a brown ball to impact him on the chest again. He grunted in pain as a new wave of nausea swept over him, leaving him with the distinct sense that he was weaker now. "So," he thought, "Shooting the sword next to the shield don't quite work very well together."

Bart took a few steps back and decided to experiment to see how close the shield could get to the sword when an image was projected. He held the shield out at a 45 degree angle and swung the sword, but nothing happened. He held it out to the side, as far away as he could hold it and swung the sword, but nothing happened. He threw the shield down in the ground nearby and swung the sword, but for the third time nothing happened.

He brandished the sword up at the sky, speaking in a slow calm voice, dripping with venom, "What's the rule for this? Can't I get some sort of instruction manual?" He let his sword arm fall to his side and stalked over to pick up his kite shield again. Eyeing the red puffy ball monsters carefully, he held his kite shield out in front of him and charged, hacking away with his sword. He was hit by another ball as he swung his sword ferociously in front of him, but in the end there were no more monsters in that clearing. Grinning, he jauntily swaggered towards another clearing that he could see.

There were a few more puffy ball monsters and in dispatching them he was burned again, but this time it wasn't so bad. In a matter of a minute, they'd all been vaporized. Bart continued on, finding himself on the shore of a lake with more ball monsters around. He charged, dispatching two and three monsters, when a blue fish-faced monster suddenly surfaced from the lake and shot a glowing orb at him. Confident from years of LARP'ing, Bart swung his shield at the orb to knock it harmlessly aside and as he made contact he felt a bolt of pain rush through his body as he grounded the electric orb. As he stood there, frozen for a split second, one of the ball creatures shot a brown ball from its mouth at him and he felt himself falling towards the ground. The last thought he had was, "That's ridiculous, electricity doesn't work like that, you can't have an electric orb…"

Bart blinked his eyes, his vision filled with a vast sheet of empty blue, then rolled up off the dirt onto his feet. He was back where he'd started, but with this difference, he felt stronger more, well, virile was the only word that could accurately describe it. It was like nothing he'd ever felt before in his life, it was like just having woken from a nap followed by a couple energy drinks and knowing that he was about to spend the afternoon with Melissa. With a flash of insight he swung his sword in front of him and shouted for joy as he watched a phantom image go sailing off through the trees. It was time to experiment.

Unfortunately, it turned out that the shield pretty much had to be held off to the side when the sword was swung to shoot an image. Even turning the shield sideways and trying to get some sort of coverage from the tip of the kite shield hadn't worked, there'd been that same strange repulsion effect. Chalk that up to experience, no shielding while shooting. It was the same sort of ridiculous rule enforced in real life paintball matches, something seemingly designed to encourage "fairness" so that you couldn't shoot unless you could also get shot. True, there was a safety aspect – if a player fell down and their mask happened to come off, you didn't want someone shooting blindly from around a corner and blinding the downed player, but that never actually happened, it was more a fairness aspect than a safety concern.

Bart headed off in the same direction, noting that the puffy red ball monsters had respawned. He grimaced, thinking to himself, "Yeah, that makes sense, I apparently respawn and so do they." Standing well back, he swung his sword a few times and vaporized them then headed off towards the lake again, making a mental note not to try and block that, well, it couldn't be an energy orb, those couldn't exist, but it had felt like the time he'd brushed up against an electric fence. It was just another sign to him that this world couldn't be real, that he must have been drugged and kidnapped or something. He'd play their game, for now, but only until he figured out how to break out.


	3. Suicide for the win -- LoB 03

The Legend of Bart, Chapter 3

Bart peered out from behind a tree and eyed the lake ahead. The lake monster seemed to actually be aware of him. No matter where he stood, it seemed like it would unerringly home in on him, shooting its energy ball right at him. Like his phantom sword image, it seemed to ignore all terrain obstacles until it either hit the unbreakable rocks, or it hit Bart, and the energy orb seemed to phase right through the walking red creatures. Swinging his sword in front of him, Bart dispatched a couple walking puff balls while dodging energy orbs until he dodged too quickly and his shield swung out to the side of him. An energy orb caught him on the edge and zapped him to the ground again.

He couldn't believe the dumb luck, now he wouldn't be able to shoot his sword until he died again and it would be ten times harder to dispatch these creatures while avoiding energy orbs and they'd just respawn when he did.

There, by the tree, only three major clearings from what he was starting to think of as the "start point", Bart blinked. The pain from the energy orb vanished. "That's the answer! What a fool I've been! All I need is to respawn, just fold my arms, fall on my sword and respawn! Respawn!" He eyed the sword in his hand. It certainly was sharp, wickedly sharp. He steeled himself for a moment, placed the tip of the sword against his chest, and threw himself forward at the ground only to find himself rolling off to the side. He knew he'd probably wake back up at the start point, it had happened to him a few times already, this world obviously wasn't real, but the intellectual acceptance of those facts were a small army compared to the biological imperative to live. He wanted to live. Sure, it seemed like the best way to continue to live was now to die on purpose whenever he was scratched by something, but that didn't change the fact that deep down inside, every fiber and every cell of his body screamed at him that they wanted to live too.

Gritting his teeth, Bart ran out to where the little monsters trundled along and picked them off one by one, dodging energy orbs the whole time. It was just as difficult as he had thought it would have been and he found himself regretting that he hadn't reset himself. He could see that this lake stretched on for quite some distance and that there were many more groups of monsters along the edge and of course with that homing energy orb and the distance from the shore that the lake monster usually surfaced at, he'd need to be able to shoot a sword to really have a chance of getting it, and, he ran back into the trees, placed the sharp sword point on his chest, closed his eyes, and before he could stop and try to think about it, he threw himself onto his sword.

He lay there in the dirt, blinking, his sword hand at an awkward angle under his body, his shield arm painfully twisted by the length of the shield, blinking away the tears that were starting to come. The sword stuck straight up through his body - he could actually feel it inside of him, just barely, almost like the tickle of a slight breath on his bare skin, but he could feel it going straight through where his heart should be, just under his ribs, and he wasn't dead. The front of his tunic was dry and he could tell that he wasn't even hurt by this attempt. Sure, his hand and arm might be sore for a minute, but he hadn't even managed to cause himself any real pain with his attempt. Whoever had created this world had forseen this possibility and apparently he wasn't going to be allowed to fall on his sword and reset his ability to shoot sword images whenever he wanted to.

As he lay there, an energy ball crashed into his side, causing his muscles to cramp up for a second and he cried out in agony before rolling onto his feet and racing up the side of the lake, anything to get away from the energy orb lake monster and to get somewhere else. As he ran through the trees, out of sight of the lake, he suddenly stopped. There was a blue little monster mixed in with the red monsters – did that mean something? He carefully started swinging his sword at the monsters and was startled to see the blue monster blink when hit by the sword, but not disappear. He swung at it again and this time it died. So blue meant two hits to kill and red meant one, then? Another creature brushed into him and as the now familiar pain swept up his side, Bart flung the sword down and threw himself onto a couple of the creatures. "One way or another," he thought, "I'm going to reset this and get my long distance ability back!" As he rolled off the creatures and they started to walk over him, his vision faded to black again.

Bart blinked his eyes, his vision filled with a vast sheet of empty blue, then rolled up off the dirt onto his feet. He was back where he'd started, but with this difference, his sword was back in his hand and once again he was filled with that same virile feeling as though he could fight the whole world with one hand tied behind his back! He swung his sword experimentally and laughed for joy as a phantom image shot out, impacting harmlessly on a nearby tree.

He raced back towards the lake, dispatching the monsters from range as he went when one monster vaporized itself and left a small pale crystal behind. He reached down to touch it and it burst apart into a cloud of, well, digitization was the only word for it, swept up his arm and into the empty pouch that he wore on his side. He looked inside the pouch and there the crystal was, seemingly whole again. He reached in to pick it up and get a closer look at it and his hand of course went right through it. "Of course it would," he thought, "There won't be any shortcuts via sharp crystal either." He dispatched another monster in a clearing and a brilliant red Valentine's Day heart was left after the monster vaporized. It pulsed at him and he could almost hear a song coming from it. He reached out to touch it and as his finger brushed its surface it too vaporized, only instead of rushing up his arm and down his side, it went straight for his face and into his mouth. He panicked for a moment, thinking that it was going to cut off his air, but then it swept away like cotton candy and he was only left with the feeling of it. It had felt great. It had tasted like, well, he hesitated to say that it tasted like a dream fulfilled, but then before today he would never have believed that you could actually wake up and feel so alive, the way he did after each reset.

That was great. If this was the point of all this, if the point was to get these random heart drops, then bring it on. Based on how things seemed to work, if he picked up enough hearts then surely he'd get some new power, maybe the ability to control his sword image and make it turn corners or something. He continued on, dispatching monsters, and occasionally running ahead into groups to reset his shooting ability, eagerly looking for more hearts. He'd play their game, for now, but only until he figured out how to break out.


	4. Fairy and the bomb -- LoB 04

The Legend of Bart, Chapter 4

((Author's Note: Apparently, this is how you add an author's note to the beginning of a story here. I suppose you, dear reader, could respond by writing a review? I don't know, the website seems sort of limited. Anyway, I believe I've added chapter titles to this and previous chapters.))

Bart pressed on. Surely there must be more to this world than these, well, random encounters? The clearing with the puff-ball monsters. The lake with more walkers and the singular lake monster, everything was summarily dispatched or run past, until he ran into the orange things? They floated along on bulbous orange body sacs with sharp red saw teeth protruding out of their body and the humming sound of their four large white wings protruding from the apex of their body sacs filled the air. He gaped in astonishment and only managed to dodge another energy orb from the lake monster. Still, though, they didn't move very quickly and would almost certainly be easy to dispatch. He casually swung his sword at one and the phantom sword image swooshed right through them, the same way the sword image harmlessly brushed through the trees, the same way that the sword itself harmlessly passed through him.

He furiously swung the sword back and forth a few times In their direction, hoping to shoot one down, and the world seemed to slow as he realized that the sword only shot once every second. He'd thought that the sword has resumed firing earlier because of his outburst, that it had been proof that someone had been watching, someone had been controlling the very environment around him, but he'd simply swung the sword too quickly at first and ever since had been too methodical. The sword only fired once a second, no matter how many times he swung it back and forth.

As this new revelation finished burning a new pathway through his neurons, the pace of the outside world suddenly picked up and multiple floating sac monsters brushed against him. He jumped to the side and rushed forward, seeking to get away, to return to the cool refuge of the woods. These untouchable floating sacs and the lake monster together were an undefeatable combination. He burst through the trees into another clearing, spotting another blue double-hit puff ball monster among a crowd of red ones, trundling along. These weren't so tough, they just required good timing. He quickly and methodically dispatched the crowd and continued on, finding himself in a small clearing with a little pond and what could only be described as a fairy floating above the water.

The fairy was roughly his height but other than that she could only be described as everything that Bart wasn't. She was slender, clad only in a red one-piece bathing suit which left little to the imagination, dainty red shoes, and a mass of long red hair surmounted by a golden crown. Two white pieces of fabric hung over the side of each hip and white wings buzzed behind her back. As Bart looked at the wings, he was reminded suddenly of the floating sacs that he'd recently encountered and how closely their primary skin color resembled her skin color and suddenly he wasn't as attracted to her anymore. He advanced cautiously, unable to shoot a sword but ready for an attack, his kite shield braced in front of him when suddenly the most wonderful thing happened.

As he approached the pond, a cloud of hearts – just like that solitary heart that he'd discovered earlier – swept into existence around him. The spun rapidly around him then shot towards him, not just filling his mouth with their taste but filling his very soul with their essence. He staggered back away from the pond, panting heavily, as the fairy stared dispassionately forward and with a sudden shock of horror Bart realized that his gaze hadn't focused on what was most important - the fairy had no face. She had no mouth, no nose, no eyes. "What sort of abomination is she," he thought to himself as he turned away, fell to his knees and, unable to overcome the wave of nausea sweeping through his body, was violently sick.

He got back to his feet, wiped his mouth on his sleeve and stumbled back down into the clearing where the puff monsters had so recently been. He shivered at the thought of facing the fairy again and headed off through the trees only to find a clearing full of giant blue one-eyed spiders. Recoiling in disgust at the thought of one of them touching him and realizing that blue meant two shots, he carefully swung his sword and frowned when the spider vaporized at the first shot, leaving another crystal behind. He swung his sword and dispatched all of them with only a single shot. So then blue didn't necessarily mean that it took two hits to dispatch something. There was another obvious cave opening in the trees and Bart descended into its depths. A middle-aged man stood inside, his trimmed brown beard which covered everything below his nose was a sharp contrast to the old man's facial decorations. After the fairy, Bart suddenly found himself wondering whether or not this man or the old man had mouths under their mustache/beards.

"Buy somethin' will ya!" This was the second time that an apparent NPC had spoken to him and Bart realized that he wasn't actually hearing words. The words were just appearing in his head like some sort of psychic emanation. Perhaps the denizens of this world, NPC or not, had no need for mouths. Perhaps, but then Bart noticed that the man was staring solidly ahead, but his eyes were a little too wide, as though he were looking at something in the distance, or was too frightened to say anything. There were three items laid out in front of the man, a large sturdy wooden shield, a bomb, and a green arrow. He set down his own sword and shield and stepped toward the man, his hands held up in a gesture of surrender.

"Look, I don't know how I got here, but maybe we can help each other, and," as he spoke Bart walked forward over where the bomb was laid on the sand and it disappeared.


	5. A store? And a dungeon! LoB 05

The Legend of Bart, Chapter 5

The bomb underneath Bart's feet vanished as completely as one of those monsters outside vanished when they died, only to reappear a moment later in a new pouch on Bart's side as he simultaneously felt his crystal pouch get lighter. Apparently they were some sort of trade item and the world itself was keeping track of Bart's overall net worth.

For one moment, Bart wondered if he were the strange one in the world. What would a race of psychics with no mouths think of someone who ran around flapping his mouth bits, indecently showing off the bits of bone embedded in his gums, all while refusing to properly think a thought? Perhaps their refusal to communicate with him in any matter other than perfunctory wasn't a reflection on their possible status as a hostage but merely the way most regular shopkeepers would barely condescend to acknowledge the presence of a homeless man who ran into their shop while visibly not wearing any pants. "I suppose that's possible," he mused, "But there's no way to really know for certain."

He walked over the green arrow and the shield but nothing happened. Probably he didn't have enough crystals. Bart wondered if it was possible to count these digitized items and put one hand in the pouch only to have one word fill his mind for a split second. *Eight* He pulled his hand out of the pouch and cautiously put it back in again only to have the same thing happen again. *Eight* Well, that was obvious, his crystal pouch was also telepathic? Looking closely at the ground, Bart noticed faint symbols etched into the dirt near each item. They must be some sort of numbering system, but he didn't recognize what any of the symbols meant.

Just to test what would happen, Bart picked up his sword, cautiously held it out in the man's direction and moved to place the tip on the fabric of the man's clothing. The complete lack of resistance as the sword passed through the body and clothing weren't very surprising. he sword moved right through the man's clothing and body as if they weren't there, although the cloth of the man's robe and the man himself certainly felt solid when Bart reached out his hand to touch the man. Feeling slightly embarrassed at his actions, Bart picked up his metal kite shield and left the cave.

The bright sunlight pricked at his eyes and Bart felt something welling up behind his eyes then turned and sneezed. Well, if this world wasn't real, at least they'd gotten that part right, stepping from dark into bright sunlight still had a tendency to make him sneeze. He headed through a few more clearings, picking up more crystals and bombs from vaporized enemies and, rarely, one of those great hearts, until he wandered up a flight of steps and found himself on a slight plateau. There were stone statues standing around with a giant cave opening set in the ground, with the mouth of the cave decorated to look like the mouth of a snake. He cautiously walked up to the cave opening and stepped down into the room beyond.

This was, it appeared to be, a dungeon of sorts with a grid of stone gargoyles placed in the room. There were two doors out of the room and naturally Bart felt himself drawn to head to the right first. There were large snakes crawling around the room, tall snakes, almost as tall as Bart. They appeared to be crawling around as randomly as the puff-ball monsters, until one saw Bart and promptly charged at him. It sped across the room, far faster than he would have thought possible. He held up his shield to block its attack but the creature was so fast it charged around the point of his kite shield and bit into an ankle. Immediately the same pain flared through his leg – apparently that was the only way this world had to register damage. Everything hurt the same, it was all painful. More snakes swarmed Bart and he started swiping his sword through them at his ankles, vaporizing them. As he dispatched the last one, a large skeleton key suddenly appeared in the room. Bart bent down to pick it up and it too seamlessly flowed up his arm onto a keyring that appeared on his belt.

Puzzled why he'd need bombs and keys, Bart went out through the only other door in the room and discovered more snakes running around between large stone blocks. Bracing his sword in front of him, Bart let the snakes run themselves onto it and vaporize, then looked around the room. There were doors on each wall of the room, and the one to the right had a steel door with a large keyhole on it. He walked up to it and tried to pull the key off his belt, but the keyring was a solid piece of steel going through two holes in his leather belt and then through the key – there was no way to get the key off. Bart reached up to bang on the door with his fist and as his hand touched the door the key melted off his belt, ran up his arm, and the door and key vaporized.

There wasn't much in this room, just some sort of blue blobby things. He thought of suiciding to get his long range sword attack back, but he didn't want to have to walk all the way back from the start section again, and they didn't seem very difficult so he just walked up and dispatched them from the side as they slid along in straight lines. The only unusual thing in this room was a large compass in one corner. He casually touched it, fully expecting it to melt and flow up his arm, which it did, but it didn't go into a pocket or onto his belt. It flowed straight up onto his face and into his eyes! He panicked, dropped everything and clawed at his face, trying to grab onto the two streams and pull them back out, but his fingers phased right through the digital liquid and suddenly he realized that he had a new sense, he could see a small orange triangle, pulsing with power, through the walls of the dungeon around him. He couldn't make out features or creatures, but he could see that orange triangle and he could hear it calling his name. He headed in that direction, fighting his way through more rooms, acquiring and using more keys, dispatching bats and a fireball worm that crawled through a sandy floor like something from Dune, some horned and hooded monsters who fought with boomerangs of all things, until he found himself face to face with a triceratops. A triceratops who, like those floating flesh sacs, appeared to be immune to his sword attacks.


End file.
